Reflect on what works and doesn’t work – What works for other couples doesn’t necessarily mean that it will work in your relationship too. Sometimes it takes an amount of trial and error to get to the place where you want your relationship to be in. Every experiment is always worth it; it is a chance to learn something new about yourself and relationship dynamics. Appreciate one another’s efforts, especially when considering the long-term benefits and compromises.

Talk to your partner – The more you can be open and honest and say the things you are scared to say, the more space for authentic connection you create. You are likely to get more honest answers from your partner if you offer them yourself. Authenticity opens up space for more depth and intimacy. When you talk with your partner, hear what your partner’s needing and feeling around this topic. Be mindful of taking things personally and misinterpreting a preference they have to mean something negative about you. And, together, see what solutions you can come up with that work for both of you. 

Schedule Your Time Together – Sleeping in separate spaces can improve the quality of your sleep but can also be a footstool for miscommunication and other emotional deprivation. Scheduling your time being together can maintain a good balance of understanding and sexual connection. As you create a space where you can greet one another in your best selves. You’ll see the re-ignition of excitement and attraction.

My partner and I found that we greet each other with more love and presence when one walks into the room, because we are in the same space with the intention of being together. We have more eye contact and more affection as a result of this. Our love making feels more connected as well. I hope this was helpful in exploring another idea of how to live with your partner that may be outside of the norm.